My breath is frozen, but my lips are on fire.

What did you do this weekend?





The Flaming Lips live in Seoul.

May or may not have been at some sort of YMCA Seoul. May have involved the lead singer crawling all over the audience in a giant clear balloon slash hamster ball. May have, once again, squashed my way to the front. May have littered my floor with confetti when I  changed into pajamas four hours later. May have been one of the best concerts I've ever seen.

Jealous?

Anatomy of a DVD방

It's 4:00 am. Your groggy, a bit disheveled, and fully dressed from the previous night. Shifting from one side, to the other, you take a deep breath and peal your face off the pleather chaise longue, on which you are currently sprawled. The room is dark, you look around, squinting to take in your surroundings, a tiny room big enough for only this small couch and a sliver of floor space. The only light in the room is coming from a 40 inch flatscreen TV, mounted on the wall opposite the door. You are two hours into Memoirs of a Geisha. Jihoo does not yet know if The Chancellor remembers her. You identify your bag and coat in a pile on the floor, joined by those of two friends sound asleep on the remaining two thirds of pleather surface. Before closing your eyes, you wonder briefly if you will be woken up when the movie ends.You rest your eyes, and are immediately asleep.

Where are you? Or, more precisely, where was I at 4:00am last Sunday? A DVDBang in Gangnam, of course. I must, once again, pause to apologize. Or, because I am the author of this blog and can write whatever I please, not apologize, but pause for correction. In my last post, I said that the two main options after a night in Seoul were to stay out until the subway opened, or stay in a jimmjilbang. This was not one hundred percent accurate. It is true that the options are stay up all night, or find a place to crash (unless I want to pay for a hundred dollar cab ride back to my hood) however, there are a few more options besides the jimmjilbang, one of which is the DVDbang.

You perhaps have noticed the frequent use of the word 방, or bang, in my blog posts (norebang, dvdbang, jimmjilbang...) Bang literally translates to "room" and when tacked on the end of a word, simply marks a location in which one can ejoy the specified activity, "nore"= sing, dvd= watch a dvd etc. DVD Bangs started appearing in Korea in the 80's, bringing their small dark rooms and abundant movie selections to cities across the country. Originally these personal movie viewing rooms were established to service both friends and Korean couples seeking refuge from the eyes of protective parents. The later likely accounts for the vast numbers of DVD Bangs, especially considering Korean's often live at home until marriage, so privacy is hard to come by.  This cultural norm, as you might imagine, results in a fair bit of shenanigans behind the private doors; but, luckily, also accounts for the near toxic levels of Lysol used to clean each room (judging by the assfixiating scent...) In recent years, with the influx of Foreign teachers and expat travelers, DVD Bangs have also begun to cater to a new demographic. That of the late night, morning subway bound, gaggle of friends in need of a few hours shut eye.

Enter my Saturday night.

Saturday afternoon was actually equally as lovely, in a different, more esthetically pleasing way. I spent about two hours at the Seoul Art Center, where a National Geographic photo exhibit is on display. While I'm pretty sure a few images (think Stephen Colbert worthy  bald eagle photo) were straight up CGI, the vast majority were both beautiful and inspiring, and left me thinking, "how can I do that?" After the photo exhibit Ali, Mike Gerri and I met up with a handful of other friends in Gangnam for some dinner (ridiculously expensive, yet delicious, chicken fingers and fries, sans ranch :(...) and and what turned into an unplanned evening out in the area. We hung around the restaurant for a few hours, enjoying some non Cass/Hite beer. (These are two of the only brands in Korea... and let's just say, both leave something to be desired.) After relocating to another bar in Gangnam, we spent the next few hours relaxing and enjoying the good company. There was even some drum circle action involved.

After parting ways with the other half of our crew, Amanda, Mike, Geri, Matt, Brian and I went off in search of some late night munchies and a place to crash. We eventually settled on some delicious and spicyspicy street food, before heading into the nearest DVD Bang and paying for two rooms. After spending entirely too long choosing movies that we were 100% planning on sleeping through, and repeatedly crushing Amanda's dreams of watching Titanic, we piled onto our respective chaise's and settled in for a much needed nap.

While I am fairly certain most DVD Bangs kick you out when the movie is over, (obviously we chose one nearly 3 hours long) Amanda, Matt and I, woke up in a completely dark room, at approximatly 8:30 am sunday morning, over an hour after our movie had ended. Although the room was reaching a heat index bordering on inferno, this extended sleep allowed for a lovely morning in Gangnam, scarfing delicious western breakfast, before setting off for a day of wanderings in Myeongdong.

While it may not seem like the most legitimate sleeping location, I SWEAR it's extremely common to find people sleeping in a vast variety of locations on any given weekend in Seoul. Finding a DVD Bang may actually be the third most legit place to sleep, only short of paying for a bed at a hostel or motel.

So my friends, I ask you not to judge. Simply do your best to appreciate, and embrace the glory of the DVD Bang as a piece of Korean culture and a interesting end of the night adventure. If any of you back home actually venture over this way, I'll  even let you watch Titanic if you want...

Random Rambles and Reflections

The following represent a smattering of thoughts, observations, and reflections that have flitted through my brain at some point or another, over the last two and a half months, but not warranted a solo post.

Two and a half months! It is crazy to think that over 1/6th of my year is already gone. This realization reaffirms my desire to make the most of my free time and weekends, try everything I can to teach my students something valuable, and appreciate the gift I have been given this year. 

Here we go.  The good. The bad. The ugly and the weird. But really... it's mostly good

GloboGym: Jangdang-dong
Last month, I finally got off my tushie and joined a local gym. Its a small, worse-for-the-wear facility, comprised of about 15 treadmills, an equal amount of stationary bikes, and a fair bit of weight machines/equipment. Not to mention, a fair few mystery machines, the most frequently utilized being this sort of disc contraption that Korean men stand on and twist from one side the the other. I haven't the slightest idea what this is accomplishing.

What it lacks in glamor, however, Jang-dang hui-tu-nes-uh ku-rub makes up in convenience and character. First of all, it is located on my block, approximately 4 min walking distance from my apartment. This fact alone makes up for any wear-and-tear on the machinery, seeing as we all know the walk to the gym takes exponentially more energy than the workout itself. Once I've made the trek, and politely declined the gym provided work out clothes (mine are just fine thanks,) I am greeted by wall to wall posters of bodybuilders. Now, I am not talking the latest and greatest of Korean bodybuilders. I am talking 1980's Western bodybuilders alla Arnold and friends. If that is not enough eye-candy, there is also a large head shot of Meg Ryan, from her You've Got Mail era. Why is this here, in a dinky gym, in a dinky suburb, of a dinky city in South Korea...your guess is as good as mine.

I have also developed a habit of getting in my daily exercise at the entirely appropriate hour of 11 pm, which has made for some interesting encounters. The first few days I joined the gym the same middle aged Korean man, with whom I set up my membership, was at the reception desk. One night, however, I exited the elevator to see a new man, who, upon seeing yours truly, smiled excitedly and said "Oh, Emily!" Clue number one that I am the only non Korean at this gym (and definitely the only white girl coming to run at 11 pm on a regular basis.) Fast forward a few days, I am strolling down the street at about 11:10 (late even for my standards). I go upstairs, and exit the elevator to find a completely lit, yet completely empty gym. I stand around for a few min and timidly call out "Anyeong haseyo..," before noticing that all the machines are off. I give in, deciding it wasn't meant to be, and get back in the elevator feeling somewhat defeated. When the doors open, however, my new friend from a few nights prior is waiting. He has clearly just taken out the trash for the night, but when he sees me says, "Oh! Emily! Running!" and points upstairs. I give him a "Neeeeh" and we go back to the fourth floor, where he happily turns the treadmills back on for me. It seems I am in the good books at the gym. Whoever is at the reception desks now checks each time I leave if I will be coming the next day. This way they know whether or not to turn off the treadmills.  Even so, I SWEAR I am making attempts to move my workout routine to a more reasonable hour. The only draw back here is that when the gym is more crowded (ie: 6 people), it is far more likely that a friendly Korean will decide that while I am huffing and puffing on the treadmill is the most appropriate time to have a conversation with their potential new American best friend (yours truly).

Good morning Seoul, Good afternoon Pyeongtaek
Variable X = The subways in and out of Seoul stop running at midnight (meaning I have to be on by 10:30 at the latest, if I want to make it back to Seojoeng-ri station)
Variable Y = Seoul never sleeps. Not the shops. Not the people. Not anyone.

X +Y = [A] typical night out in Seoul ending only when you are eating street food, sitting in the subway station at 6 am waiting for that first train. Basically, if you are gearing up for a night in the city, you must mentally prepare yourself for the long haul, or resolve to spend the wee hours of the morning napping in a Jimmjilbang (24 hour spa / place to crash for a few hours before the subway starts running.)

What did I ever do with only 12 eggs?
In Korea, the grocery and convenience stores sell eggs in large trays of 30 (or you can buy 5 trays... as in 150 eggs at once). Anyone who has ever lived with me, or worked as a supervisor at Beber Camp in the last few summers, knows that this alone is enough to win my heart.


Long-Duck-Dong, is that you??
I swear I am not being culturally insensitive here. I am reacting not to the horrible stereotype portrayed, but to the appearance of the character. One of my students looks EXACTLY like Long Duck Dong from 16 candles. I'm also starting to think I have his brother in my first grade after school class, which makes me quite tempted to call him Short Duck Dong.



Yes, you may be drinking popcorn.
A weird thing happened the other day and yet, it is a perfect metaphor for much of my time spent here in Korea. I was sitting on my couch, doing something or other, and felt a bit parched. I ventured into the kitchen and pulled a large bottle of mystery tea out of the fridge. On a previous afternoon, I had visited my local grocery store and, among a variety of odd purchases, decided I would like some iced tea. Recognizing only the Korean words for green tea (and the word tea, itself) I grabbed a bottle of Nok-cha (green tea) and an assortment of other "chas" to test the waters with. The bottle in question was an ambery-ish liquid that I though might be ginger tea. Wrong. At first sip I thought, "That's not what I thought this would taste like." and "I'm not quite sure if I like this..." but, as I said, I was parched and had about a liter of this mystery beverage left to drink, so I forged on, taking a few big gulps. Even after 30 minutes, I wasn't quite sure I how I felt about this experiment; bu,t I was starting to get the feeling I was drinking corn. The subtle taste of popcorn came on slowly. At first, I thought I may be hallucinating, as a result of my airpop withdrall; but, eventually, I was prettttyyy sure I was straight up drinking corn. I spent more than a few moments deciphering the messy hangul script on the bottle, and promptly typed my findings into Google. SO, what did I find?


옥수수차 Oksusu cha (literally "corn tea") is a traditional Korean tisane made from boiled roasted corn kernels.

Thank you Wikipedia, source of all knowledge, for confirming my suspicions.

Much like many things in Korea that have seemed  a bit weird at first, I found that after about an hour I was really enjoying my Oksusu cha. In fact, there is a new bottle chillin' in my fridge as I write this and I am probably drinking the entire liter as you read it.

I'd like a cup of coffee please... 
"Korean coffee" is the cryptonite of my morning routine. While the label reads coffee, or "Kopi," the contents of my maxim gold kopi packets are fighting this classification with everything they've got. The word "packets" perhaps tipped you off to the fact that we are not talking about the real deal here, let along the amazing latte's of my time in Italy. I am talking super sugary instant coffee, with instant creamer already added to the packet. It's rather more like syrup (or liquid crack) than anything resembling my beverage addiction of choice. Now you may be asking. "Emily, how do you drink such a vile concoction?" If I was Emily (and I am) I would answer, "I mix a mugs worth of crack liquid every morning, and let it cool while I get dressed, allowing me to drink the entire cup in two quick gulps." If I were your average Korean I would say, "I mix one packet with approximately two thimbles full of water and enjoy my traditional Korean coffee (yes, I said traditional...) out of a paper dixie cup."

I have to apologize here; I will just never fully adopt the coffee habits of Korean's. I think my dentist will appreciate my attitude in the long run.


And in special honor of today's [yesterday's] date...

Teacher! Teacher! 빼빼로! Peppero! Peppero!
November 11 is a day like non other in Korea, a day that happens but once a year, a day that brings the excitement and sugar consumption of Korean children (and adults) to dangerous levels. Today is Peppero Day! What is Peppero Day you may be asking? Or what are "Peppero?" to be exact. The answer, my friends, is twofold.

Peppero are skinny stick-like biscuits covered in, or filled with, chocolate. I have decided that "Peppero Day" is the single most suscesfull advertising campaign of all time. About 10 years ago Lotte, the company that manufactures Peppero, made a ground breaking connection. The date November 11th, or 11.11 looks strikingly similar to 4 Peppero sticks.  Coincidence, I think not. Lotte, one of the largest companies in Korea, also thinks not, and thus declared this day "Peppero Day." Basically Korean children, teens, and some adults buy excessive amounts of Peppero sticks, ranging from standard boxes of 10 small sticks, to individually packaged jumbo sticks, to elaborate Peppero gift sets (Korean's love a good gift set.) These goodies are passed out to friends, teachers, co-workers, the boy 4 rows over that you have a crush on.. etc.

Peppero Day provided me with an excellent excuse to eat inappropriate amounts of Peppero for 12 hours and has given me the opportunity to provide you with a fabulous, symbolic introduction to the students of Banji Elementary School.

1st and 2nd graders on Peppero day: Knocked on the door of my office terrified, to bring me Peppero's and, after I thanked them, mummbled "your welcome" in barely audible tone before running out the door shrieking and giggling.

3rd graders on Peppero day: Literally would not let me leave the classroom without shoving boxes into my hands and/or chased me down the hall completely overjoyed to give me Peppero's.

6th graders on Peppero day: Repeatedly came to my office and said "Teacher, give me Peppero!"

All the reasons my monsters can be so wonderful and so annoying!

That is all for now, I will probably post some Random Ramblings every now and then, to share with you those little things which make my daily life so entertaining.

안녕히계세요,
Emily


  

A Thousand Words.

Told you I would do it some day.

I've uploaded photos to my old snapfish account. You can check them out by using the link in the right sidebar (although printing and ordering your own would be awkward, so please refrain.) For those of you in the facebook universe, they are the same pictures posted in my album there. For everyone else, enjoy a few small glimpses of my life in South Korea.

"The goal is not to change the subject, but for the subject to change the photographer."

Miss Frizzle Explores Hanguk Healthcare

credit/thanks: Brian Rosenfeld (Ansananswers.com)

Admit it, I sparked your interest with the title didn't I??? 

Not Enough? (Divert eyes to the left) 

Now I know I've got you. 

I promised myself this blog would be both the good and the bad of my year here, so I guess this one is a bit of both..

Halloween Seoul Style

For those dear readers living under a rock, the past weekend was Halloween in Korea (as well as the US.. and everywhere.) Although typically Koreans don't celebrate Halloween, the foreigner population makes up for this by coming out in full force. The wide-spread foreigner euphoria, combined with the propensity of most Native English Teachers to plan Halloween themed lessons and shower their children with candy for a week, is enough to ensure both a week plagued by hoards of children chanting, "Trick-or-Treat" over and over again outside one's office door, and some rockin' Saturday festivities in Seoul. So, after a week of teaching, trick-or-treating, and trying to explain to the 6th graders that I have to save some candy for the 1st and 2nd graders, I spent Friday night catching up on NCIS and cutting out dinosaurs in my bed. Why you may ask? (if you glazed over my spectacular title) After abandoning my dream of creating a "Zeeto" costume (Zeeto is an Alien cartoon that accompanies my 3rd grade books) due to my lack of a hot glue gun, face paint, and giant fabric/craft store,  I decided to be Miss Frizzle from the Magic School Bus, learning about dinosaurs. If I had to dig deeper, I'd say this costume is a shout out to my Canadian dearest KQ, an expression of my love for dino's, preparation for my Magic School Buss science themed winter camp, and homage to the teacher I always want to be (the frizz). 

After taking it easy Friday night, I hoped on a train/bus to Ansan to get ready with Ali and meet up with some other friends before heading to Seoul. The necessary kimbap and mandu were scarfed, before changing into our costumes and heading up to Whitney and Brian's apartment, during which time more costume pieces were assembled, readjusted and competed, and lost. A hand full of us hung out there for a while before heading to the subway, not having the slightest idea what to expect once stepping out the door. Growing up in the states, and living in Madison for the last 5 years, costumes have become pretty much the regular. I cannot even begin to count the amount of time I have spent cutting ridiculous patterns, ending up covered in fur or feathers, and nearly burning my fingerprints off with hot glue. Such is not the case in Korea, especially as most of the festivities remain condensed in a few areas of the city. Needless to say, we created a bit of a scene walking to the subway. I'm talking large groups of Korean's wanting to take photos of us, take photos of us with their children, taking photos with their cell phones from second story windows, and (I think) generally enjoying our entertainment. These antics continued the entire subway ride, where we happened upon a group of parents and their children, who were simply overjoyed/terrified to see us (most likely due to the fact that we were traveling with a ladybug, Miss Frizzle, a green glittery leprechaun, a sliver glittery wizard, a giant ghostbuster symbol, and a werewolf). Many photos were taken, laughs were had, and one of the kids (in a superman costume/shirt) even gave us some Korean snacks. Now, if I was a parent, I am not so sure I would be encouraging my child to go talk to a bunch of rowdy, costumed, foreigners, on the subway BUT we loved every second of it, so thanks a million SoKo parents.

Throughout the course of the night, we made the rounds through Itaewon and Hongdae, finding friends here and there and loosing some others along the way. Some time was spent in a park in the middle of Hongdae, and a some confusion ensued after everyone we spoke to said they were in the same place, yet no one could tell us how to get there. Although we never found the elusive "Soundaholic," the night was a blast and good times were had by all. Somehow Ali and I managed to loose each other, but I got myself back to her apartment. and all was well in the end. I even woke up on Sunday felling pretty fab. 

Little did I know, this was not to last.

Korean Plague vs. Swine'09 / My co-teacher saw half my tushie

For those who didn't experience the joys of Swine Flu, it basically hits you like a ton of bricks. One min your fine... the next .. done-zo. My Sunday night went down kind of like that. As I said, I felt just dandy when I woke up on Sunday, grabbed some food (you guessed it...spicy noodle bowl) and headed back to Pyeongtaek. It is important to note that I was all ready to go home and clean the apt, finish up some last min lesson stuff etc, and that alcohol had literally nothing to do with the onset of this mystery illness. After arriving home, I did actually accomplish the work I needed to for school; so, I decided to make some dinner and get to bed early. All was going according to plan until say... midnight, when I woke up with a raging fever, feeling like acid was eating away at my throat, and my brain was going to explode out my ears. Sounds nice right?

The next 36 hours were spent in and our of sleep, fever raging, totally delirious, cursing the hammering constructions workers, and being generally miserable. Now, when I say delirious. I mean serious business. I am not a frequent reader of bible stories, at least not since Hebrew school graduation; but, I am currently reading The Red Tent, by Anita Diamant, a fictional novel about Dinah, the daughter of Jacob. (Highly recommended, at least to those with ovaries) Again, I am not an expert on biblical literature (in fact, it was the only class I nearly failed in college) but for a large portion of Monday, I was having vivid delusional dreams about biblical family trees. This stream of (un)concisouness ended only after talking to my teacher for the second time and being told she would plan the lessons for the next day. What happened next? Are you ready for this? At this point, I started having delusional dreams about the lessons I am supposed to be teaching this week! I literally couldn't get them out of my head! All these things I needed to do, or bring to school, or remember to make... all of which were completely irrational and fabricated. Maybe that's how I know I am meant to be a teacher. I was also surviving solely on water and a few spoon fulls of rice at this point.. so maybe starvation had something to do with it. 

After a confusing and disgusting day and night, during most of which I had trouble telling whether it was 6 am or 6pm, I still felt pretty bad on Tuesday morning BUT I wasn't throwing up anymore, so I decided to try to go to school. I woke up and showered, contemplated calling to say I couldn't come to school, but then thought "Hey, I worked for 2 weeks with Swine Flu. I can do this." and walked out the door. Giving myself ample time to shuffle my feet to school, I arrived about 25 min later, sweating like and dog, my most recent batch of fever breaking as I collapsed into my chair and tried to think about what lessons I was even supposed to be teaching that day. Exactly one minute later, Juha walked into the office, took one look at me and said "Oh, Emily! You need to rest more, you should have called me. You need to rest!" I nearly cried I was so happy (Koreans can usually put this work-a-holic to shame) and set off in search of my pretty pretty princess bed. 8 hours of horrible sleep, breaking fevers, and a monster trying to claw its way of of my throat later, I decided it was time to see a doctor. Now, here is where the party really gets started. 

Seeing as I  A. don't know where to find a doctor B. don't know how to tell someone what is wrong short of pointing to places and saying "Apayo" (hurt) and C. can't even pretend like I would understand much medical termanology thrown at me in English, let alone Korean, I called Juha at the end of the school day and ask if she could help me. Fast forward 25 minutes. I am sitting in a chair sort of like a dentists the a ENT (ear nose and throat) clinic. A Korean doctor has just introduced himself (he actually speaks decent English) and then asks me about my symptoms. At one point he is asking me a questions I don't understand, so I he writes the English word on a piece of paper. I stare blankly and eventually say, "I'm sorry, I have no idea what this is..." He asks me what my major in college was, and I think figures out that I will not understand medical terms, when I respond, "Art Education." After checking my ears and declaring them normal, doctor tells me to open wide so he can look at my throat. After about one second, his sits back and says "Oh, it is very severe." Then doctor doctor takes out a 4-5 inch skinny camera tube thing, which he informs me he will shove down my throat, so I can see the problem on the screen. Lovely. Also, at this exact moment, doctor decides it is the appropriate time to talk about Midway airport. After showing me the sick nasty white patches on my throat (which I'm pretty sure horrified my co-teacher) this man tells me he will remove the white patches. I'm confused and not quite clear on what sort of method this is, but doctor is sure. He shoves a long swab of something gross and then some sort of sucker contraption further down my throat than I thought possible. I presume this machine was removing said patches, but it's realllllly hard to say. Keep in mind, he is continuing the chatter about Midway, and now Northwestern, that is, until I almost throw up on him.

Ok, sucker down the throat, Check. I think the treatment is over. 

No, no, no Emily; how could you be so silly. I forgot, I am in Korea. Before I leave I must be hooked up to an IV of what I am pretty sure was Gatorade and painkillers, be given an antibiotic shot in my hip/tushie, and pick up my prescribed candypackets of pills for the next two days. Literally 30 pills, in a variety of shapes and sizes. (note : this whole experience cost me a whopping 18$ .. what up Korean heath insurance)

I'm not exactly sure what medications or treatment I have been given. Seeing as my medical expertise comes from only two places, House and my father, I'd say there are two options. Number one: if I listen to house, I probably had Sarcoigdosis. I am not sure what that is, but they think the patient has it on nearly every episode. If I take the road of sanity and reality, and listen to my father, I would guess that the shot was the higher does of antibiotics you take the first day in order to kill the majority of the illness. The IV bag was restoring the electrolites I had lost over the last two days, and numbing the pain in my throat and ears, and as for the sucker contraption... suggestions are welcome. 

At the end of the day, I may not understand their methods, I may have blindly trusted a Korean doctor who may or may not have visited Chicago, and I may have been dosed up with a dozen kinds of medication; BUT after my trip to the doctor I felt fantastic. A little tired, yes. Hungry, definitely; but, overall I was doing great, had a wonderful night sleep, and was as happy as I have ever been to go back to work in the morning. 

The last two days at school have been lovely; although, I must repeatedly assure various teachers, who are living in fear that I will drop dead at any moment, that I am still resting. 

That is all for my tales of the Korean heath care system! Hopefully it will be my last note on the subject! For now, I am looking forward to a relaxing weekend, taking it easy and taking it slow.

On a final note, if you all could be so kind as to not relay this post to my dearest Bubbie, I think it would be for the best... for everyone. 

안녕히계세요